Essay: New Year's with Yang Tao

Today is Chinese New Year, which makes it a good day to share this story from Theresa and her husband Craig in Florida. They are long-time friends of my husband's family, and started the A Candle in the Window Hospitality Network to help Christians show and receive hospitality. But their hospitality isn't limited only to Christians, and this story of how they invited a Chinese acquaintance to join them for their American New Year's celebration illustrates that. I love Theresa's emphasis on including your guests (whether they're Christians or not) in your everyday activities. —Julie

“How does one say ‘thank you’ in Chinese?” my husband Craig asked the Chinese waiter.
“Xie xie,” smiled the young man.
“Xie xie?” he attempted.
“No, xie xie,” the waiter said patiently.
Xie xie,” our daughters echoed. The waiter beamed!

From that moment on, a chorus of “xie xie” followed every movement he made toward our table. Thus began our friendship with Yang Tao.

It seems that wherever we have lived, we have chosen a restaurant or two as our “hang outs”, returning to them time and time again. In the process, we have gotten to know the waiters and waitresses. I suppose we're easy customers to remember. We were always a party of eight—my husband and me, five kids and Grandma, plus a wheelchair and for many years, a high chair. (I'm almost surprised any restaurant welcomed us back!)

Anyway, that was how we got to know Yang Tao. Soon he began to give little gifts to the children whenever we came in...handkerchiefs embroidered with panda bears or the Great Wall of China, little dangling Chinese thing-a-ma-bobs, or a piece of jade with engraving on it. Once when we came in, he slipped out the door for a few minutes and came back into the restaurant with M&M's for the kids.

Knowing that Chinese New Year is such a big celebration, we invited Yang Tao over for an American New Year’s Day. He arrived promptly at the time we had set, doling out little gifts for each child. We had a traditional Southern New Year’s meal of roast, mashed potatoes, greens and black-eyed peas. The girls asked him lots of questions about China, his family, and how he came to be here. A student at first, he was now only working and his return to China was imminent. We were amazed at his surprisingly broad knowledge of US History. (His favorite president? Richard Nixon and “that Bill Clinton, he been very good to us, too!”) 

After dinner, Craig got out the Bible and explained that in our family, it is our habit at meal’s end to read together from the Bible—and that we call it “family worship”. Yang Tao smiled and nodded eagerly.

I don’t remember exactly what we were reading at the time, but I do remember at the end, that Yang Tao took the Bible and fingered it. We told him he could keep it and take it back to China. He thanked us profusely.

Yang Tao came over a few times after that. He taught our daughters some Chinese calligraphy. Once, he brought a girlfriend along—a Chinese-American with whom he said  was "considering marriage". Craig took the opportunity to share with them the Biblical concept of Christian marriage—a covenant before God and not something to be entered into frivolously (or in hopes of remaining in America)!

And then he was gone.

About a year later we received a note from him, a New Year’s greeting: “...I always talking about you to my family...” he wrote. I pray that in our brief interactions, he experienced more than just a cultural exchange with an American family. I pray that he got a taste—as imperfect as it was—of God’s love for him, and that the Bible he took back continues to speak to his heart of the God who is there.

"Invite others in and just include them in what you’re already doing."

We never saw him again, but our friendship with Yang Tao encouraged us to reach out to others. You can do this, too! Invite others in and just include them in what you’re already doing. That’s what we did with Yang Tao. We read the Bible we always did. We asked if there was anything he wanted us to pray about, and prayed for him. 

Look around for those whom God has placed in your life—even a waiter at your favourite restaurant—who might have little or no interaction with the people of God. Your hospitality might be the conduit through which God chooses to reach into a heart with His love.